id like to think
that you never left

id like to think
that i didnt hear the reverberation of the door
closing in on the two of us.

ive made a fort
out of unwanted memories
i desperately try to keep at bay
but they keep on calling out to me like it was a graveyard
reaching for victims
bewitched by consternation

broken mirrors,
mangled sheets,
drive thrus in the ungodly hours, awkward silences,
cut outs of what we shared together —

those things
could never compare with
how i feel so at home
with another being's body before

all my life,
all i ever did
was give such tumultuous love
and receive none of it back.

so id like to pretend
even though
i am constantly marred by reality.