i'm no liar
but i keep hiding the truth
i am becoming something i'm scared of
in the effort of attaining you
please help me out here
i just want to make you love me
tried every trick in the book
and still my hopes are plunging
i do everything that i possibly can
even if it's not right
i put my own feelings aside
entertain you with a growing mountain of lies
why can't you love me
the way that i am

you're never gonna love me
what's so hard to understand
i'm nothing but a sheep
that can give you minuscule amounts of joy
nothing but a distraction
once interesting but now i am an old toy
nothing about the real me
catches your eye
nothing special to consider
just another person nagging you all the time
i can't be the one you love
because you don't see my heart

but now i know it's not me
it's bout the monster you truly are
it's about the ways you make people feel
when they don't act how you want them to
it's the way you ignore me unless
i have something you might need to use
like my patience, money, attention and time
only useful in the moment
too late to go back before i saw your ugly side
you've already shown it
i'm tired of succumbing and feeling
like all of this was my fault

but in all honestly
we both did each other wrong
i was not right
you weren't either
needed a clean break
but i gave you a breather
when you hurt me
i took it badly
i couldn't bring myself to
let you seem happy
first i wanted you back
then i knew that it just wouldn't work
then i blamed it ll on you
now i am giving you the apology you deserve
i am sorry
but at least i know better now

you are probably not gonna care