Today is the beginning of two weeks apart from you.
All the times I've said I love you, I'm still afraid it's true.
Still, after all the times, I've said it, it still feels wrong.
2 weeks has never seemed so long.
I remember yesterday. I woke up early, and panicking, and feeling guilty again. I kept you up again, sitting in your car and crying hard.
But in the morning sun, it didn't seem so bad.
It took you an hour to get out of bed, an hour of hand holding and talking about feelings.
You got out of bed and got onto me.
We sat on your floor, me holding you, you holding me.
It took another hour and a half for either of us to start the day.
I knew you were leaving then. I told you that you needed to leave when you wanted me to tell you to stay.
You need to go.
I need to stay.
we need to stop needing each other.
2 weeks has never seemed so long.
2 weeks for something to go wrong.
I love you, and you say you love me.
You don't want me to be in love with you. the reason you trust me is because you believe I'm not.
You and I both know I am. I hate that I feel that way. I wish it wasn't the truth.
I love you enough that I love you, without being in love.
It doesn't make sense to me. but it does to you.
I wish I didn't feel so bad, even after all we've been through.
2 weeks apart, and I hope I'll stop being in love with you.