I was 11 years old when I knew
"female" was not me
I never like wearing dresses or skirts
but as the first girl in the new generation, it wasn't my call
I was always a princess
I wanted to be a pirate...
a viking...
a wizard...
that's when I knew
and I blocked it
I procrastinated in my own  gender
now I'm 18 and I put my old beanie on my head
just to remember the feeling
I didn't know I was bringing it back but now immortal
3 days have passed
my eyebags are darker
and my hair is shorter
I want the scars beneath my chest
and my beanie on my head