Dear Mercy Girl,

I know the nights when the tears come in silent screams
But the screaming music should block out everything

I am the pins and needles in your fingertips, held captive underneath your thighs
As they itch to grasp the cold metal
That cuts hot
Opening your skin like a present on a random day
That isn’t your birthday
But that doesn’t faze you
Because you’ll collect smiles where you can find them


I know the fireworks in your chest
The tearing of muscle and tissue but I promise your heart is okay

I am the knot that forms in your throat
You swallow me but I’ll just grow in the pit of your stomach…

Let yourself write tearless words of someday, one day inspiration,
Vindication that you feel

I know the emptiness,
The emotionless façade
Broken by the deafening muteness of your cries for help
You’re helpless,
Hopeless, but hoping
For anything
Except the numbness that envelops you.

And I know the numbness
That keeps you cold as you open yourself
Hot
Blue burns red,
But didn’t you know feeling isn’t your friend?

I am the stairs screaming in protest under the sudden weight of your mother coming to check on you
Because you are loved.
Hide your knife, the only weapon you need tonight is that smile
Promising you love her too.

I know the nights when the sound of your own breathing is too much noise
So I become your heartbeat
Feel me remind you that you’re still alive.

Because I feel everything.
And I feel you.
So when you need to talk about nothingness, let me be there.
You don’t need to wrap yourself in long sleeves and your scarred arms,
Share with me your troubles.
You’re too young and alive to be dying alone.
-A friend.