Jan 2019
FICTION.
Imagine driving up to a
forecourt of a filling station
where, for some bazaar
reason, there's only one
pump but it is not marked,
whether it is petrol or diesel.
You are aware though, what
your car functions on.
There are four males in
pristine uniforms standing
there waiting to serve you.
So, you enquire of one,
"Is the pump petrol or diesel" ?
The first attendant replies:
I don't know, does it matter?
Again you ask, is there anyone
I could enquire from, to be sure?
The second one replies this time:
"You could go on line and find out".
You respond,"I have no time for that now".
The third attendant gets involved.
"If you come back tomorrow, the
owner will be here and you can ask".
So, you try to explain that you want
it now, because you are going to a
funeral in 15 minutes.
The fourth attendant comes up with
a suggestion.
"If I squirt some on the ground, could
you tell the difference" ?
<>
FACT
I walked into a coffee shop and for
some bazaar reason the bean dispenser
did not display whether it was Arabica
or Robusta.
I have an educated palate and know
well which of the two is my preferred
choice. There were four females in pristine
uniforms waiting to serve me.
So, I enquired, of one, is this coffee
Arabica or Robusta?
The first waitress replies,
" I don't know, does it matter " ?
Again I asked, is there anyone
I could enquire from, to be sure?
The second one replies this time:
"You could go on line and find out"
I responded, "I have no time for that now".
The third waitress gets involved.
"If you come back tomorrow, the
owner will be here and you can ask".
So, I tried to explain that I wanted
it now, because I was going to a
funeral in 15 minutes.
The fourth waitress comes up with
a suggestion.
"If I spill beans on the counter, could
you tell the difference" ?
<>
This is an accurate account of an
incident I experienced yesterday.
Also, I would like to add, I once
owned a cafe, had a coffee club
but more importantly, I do not use
sugar, therefore Robusta can be
vile and bitter on the palate, if one
is not having it in tandem with
sweet cake or desert. Whereas, an
Arabica, though less caffeine, is
a much softer taste.
But Ireland is a tea drinking nation
and despite being EEC pseudo
continentals since the 70s
somethings can never be changed.
Imagine driving up to a
forecourt of a filling station
where, for some bazaar
reason, there's only one
pump but it is not marked,
whether it is petrol or diesel.
You are aware though, what
your car functions on.
There are four males in
pristine uniforms standing
there waiting to serve you.
So, you enquire of one,
"Is the pump petrol or diesel" ?
The first attendant replies:
I don't know, does it matter?
Again you ask, is there anyone
I could enquire from, to be sure?
The second one replies this time:
"You could go on line and find out".
You respond,"I have no time for that now".
The third attendant gets involved.
"If you come back tomorrow, the
owner will be here and you can ask".
So, you try to explain that you want
it now, because you are going to a
funeral in 15 minutes.
The fourth attendant comes up with
a suggestion.
"If I squirt some on the ground, could
you tell the difference" ?
<>
FACT
I walked into a coffee shop and for
some bazaar reason the bean dispenser
did not display whether it was Arabica
or Robusta.
I have an educated palate and know
well which of the two is my preferred
choice. There were four females in pristine
uniforms waiting to serve me.
So, I enquired, of one, is this coffee
Arabica or Robusta?
The first waitress replies,
" I don't know, does it matter " ?
Again I asked, is there anyone
I could enquire from, to be sure?
The second one replies this time:
"You could go on line and find out"
I responded, "I have no time for that now".
The third waitress gets involved.
"If you come back tomorrow, the
owner will be here and you can ask".
So, I tried to explain that I wanted
it now, because I was going to a
funeral in 15 minutes.
The fourth waitress comes up with
a suggestion.
"If I spill beans on the counter, could
you tell the difference" ?
<>
This is an accurate account of an
incident I experienced yesterday.
Also, I would like to add, I once
owned a cafe, had a coffee club
but more importantly, I do not use
sugar, therefore Robusta can be
vile and bitter on the palate, if one
is not having it in tandem with
sweet cake or desert. Whereas, an
Arabica, though less caffeine, is
a much softer taste.
But Ireland is a tea drinking nation
and despite being EEC pseudo
continentals since the 70s
somethings can never be changed.
