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Dec 2018
Every time I see a cute couple pass by,
I try to remember how it felt when I was the apple of your eye.
The time it was as perfect as a fairy tale,
The time I was sure my love would never fail.

I try to recall the first time you held my hand,
That moment when you carved our names on the sand.
How the way you looked at me gave me butterflies,
How you promised me all the happiness under the twinkling skies.
deep down I run, those memories I try to hijack,
But it's all empty in there , it’s all black.

Had a thirty feet high and a two feet thick wall,
You scaled it in a blink, and made me fall.
I loved you with my soul, with every beat of my heart,
I couldn't even stand the thought of us being apart.
I loved you the way Rose loved Jack,
But look at the irony your love turned out to be black.

The day I invited you over, cooked your favourite pie,
You stabbed me right in my heart, and let it bleed dry.
I was always brave, still wanted to live, move on,
But you played with me, treated me like a worthless pawn.
It's been a while now, so I try to overlook that crack,
But I still don't remember how love felt like, it's still all black.


I don't feel anything now, cause, what happened was tragic,
But don't they say that love is magic?

I’m over it now, those memories don't make me weak,
Just sometimes a little drop of tear rolls down my cheek.
Cause now I no more know for what’s real and what's a mask,
I just want to feel love again,
wonder if that's a lot to ask?


True – even broken crayons work, but it’s not my life that I want to colour,
I want to selflessly complete someone, i want to make him fuller.

I want to stick tight to someone, and hug him for hours,
Sing him stupid romantic songs on dates, which we'll plan under the stars.
I want someone as crazy as I am, want a partner in crime,
Someone who can make me a good drink, with a tinge of ginger and lime.
I want something to click, every time our eyes meet,
Every time I see him, I wanna skip a heartbeat.
When I see a falling star, I wanna wish for his heart a little more,
I want love, love that most don't believe in, anymore.

Then it doesn't matter if I don't remember my first kiss, date or that blue ring,
I just want to be someone’s last everything.

Love is all I want, and now that it is crystal clear,
Why do I drift away whenever it tries to come near?

What scares me now are not the heights,
But the feeling that I'll have no one to cuddle with on movie nights.
When I'll take my last breath, cold in a grave I'll lie,
Will there be somebody who will atleast kiss me goodbye?
That single thought shatters all those lovely dreams,
My heart just stops and loudly it screams,
Wonders, what if over my casket there'll be no one who'll mourn?
What if I die the way I have lived? What if I die all alone?
What if my destiny never plans a ‘always and forever’ track?
What if it’s always raven? What if it’s always black?
Written by
Rutuja Nahar  20/F
(20/F)   
114
 
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