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Make Sense

My understanding of things, important things, has left me.

It doesn't make sense, to make sense of this

How can it be, how can this follow a plan?

There is no plan, no divine decree or meant to be.

There is no reason, not for this, not for this.

Can we ask, or dare we, who hurts more, who hurts most

It doesn't matter.  Heartbreak has no calculus

Apparently hurt, fear, isolation, loneliness, desperation, anger, and retribution don't either

I wonder if that's the the lethal parade,

and what's missing?

Abuse, neglect, weakness, genetics, propensities... Or just evil

Evil makes it simpler.  Evil makes sense.

I need someone to blame, i want someone to blame,

because I'm angry...

And I want to make sense of it

No wait,

I'm sad and heartbroken and bewildered,

at the senselessness.

This just won't make sense.

But, I will awake tomorrow, my life, my wife and son and daughter, in tact.

What's left then,

when there's no moral,

no lesson,

no purpose to it?

Just to love and mourn and feel, and cry...  For a while

It's hard to know, when there is no sense.

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Written by
russell-william-johnson
58 / M / American
Published
Dec 16, 2012
Lines·Words
26·191
Notes

Wrote this the day after the school children and teachers were killed in Newtown

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