Oct 2018
TRIGGER WARNING: CONTENT PERTAINS TO DEPRESSION AND SUICIDE
Little demons bounce around in
your skull, screaming obscenities
and those same old revelations.
All the while, the strange sounds of
"you're fine," "you're nice," "you're not that bad,"
"you’re not evil,” gets replayed out
of their mouths again. As if they
know your sins. That never-ending
winter you are freezing in. If
only they knew, but you’ll never
tell them. You'd die first. And more and
more that looks like the optimal
choice. Your demise a voice for this
injustice, finally putting
down that mad dog robbing all of
them of a peaceful existence.
Why should such a savage exist?
So you can spread your disgusting
penitence with warm and oh so
bold and colorful poetics?
Why not just end it? Instead you
feed it like the coward you are,
the typical evil piece of
**** that rips up hearts and leaves them
to the wolves. And no one knows, and
no one will care, if you are not
the same as you were back then. This
redemption is an illusion
you fool around with to cool your
intemperance, as useless as
your pathetic attempts at some
rehabilitation, and if
you were honest you'd accept that
your suffering is warranted.
So go meet your end, you *******
sick depressing ****, before you
get selfish again and ruin
another beautiful person.
Little demons bounce around in
your skull, screaming obscenities
and those same old revelations.
All the while, the strange sounds of
"you're fine," "you're nice," "you're not that bad,"
"you’re not evil,” gets replayed out
of their mouths again. As if they
know your sins. That never-ending
winter you are freezing in. If
only they knew, but you’ll never
tell them. You'd die first. And more and
more that looks like the optimal
choice. Your demise a voice for this
injustice, finally putting
down that mad dog robbing all of
them of a peaceful existence.
Why should such a savage exist?
So you can spread your disgusting
penitence with warm and oh so
bold and colorful poetics?
Why not just end it? Instead you
feed it like the coward you are,
the typical evil piece of
**** that rips up hearts and leaves them
to the wolves. And no one knows, and
no one will care, if you are not
the same as you were back then. This
redemption is an illusion
you fool around with to cool your
intemperance, as useless as
your pathetic attempts at some
rehabilitation, and if
you were honest you'd accept that
your suffering is warranted.
So go meet your end, you *******
sick depressing ****, before you
get selfish again and ruin
another beautiful person.
Please make sure you're in a stable position to read this poem, and if you're not in a stable position to read it, don't do the stupid stuff I do and instead call that number that Logic taught you: 1-800-273-8255.
(And please excuse any humor or lightness that I might express about this topic, now or in the future. I'm very, very intimate with it, and by my own experience and what I know of others is that, the closer and deeper you're in it personally the more humor you can both find in it and need from it. Though to each their own.)
Also, I didn't know this as I wrote the poem, but October is National Depression Month, and, in particular, today, October 11th, is National Depression Screening Day. Do yourself a favor and get checked out, especially if you can relate to my writing or share any of the more typical symptoms.
(And please excuse any humor or lightness that I might express about this topic, now or in the future. I'm very, very intimate with it, and by my own experience and what I know of others is that, the closer and deeper you're in it personally the more humor you can both find in it and need from it. Though to each their own.)
Also, I didn't know this as I wrote the poem, but October is National Depression Month, and, in particular, today, October 11th, is National Depression Screening Day. Do yourself a favor and get checked out, especially if you can relate to my writing or share any of the more typical symptoms.
