I'm too young to feel this numb
I'm too young to feel this pain
It's not fair for all the shame that we face when we want to express the way we feel
I'm too ashamed of my thoughts
I can't believe I think those things
I wish I could turn my brain off
And just float away
You can only escape for so long but when the high is gone you drop back into the low and keep on drifting down the long dusty road looking for a turn a path an exit that doesn't end with your existence
I try to leave my body behind exit my self just for a little while but its hardest to run from the thing that is close
My bed has become my place a comfy hole for me to hind my face I feel strapped in pulled by an invisible force you don't know how many chains I pull with me when I try to get up I yank for my life and pull for my happiness and someday I can shake the chains and escape I can make it to the door and fall to the floor praying that tomorrow I will be able to do the same thing
that someday I will shake away the shame but for now I'm trapped chained down to my bed to many thoughts racing through my head I try to push them out I don't want to hear them shout

get out of my head
get out of my head
do I really want to be dead?
This though enters in my brain I can only ignore it for so long till it comes back creeping in I feel the words swim around me like a chain and pulls me deeper into bed
today I will not be able to escape
today I will not fall to the floor