sitting in my math, aching hand writing what ever the teacher was,
trying to catch and keep up.
"ok, now you guys do the next problem.",
i sat back and i blanked out.
i don't remember writing any of this,
i don't know what this means,
these numbers,
this page.
i forget where i am and who i am.
i try to ground myself but realize that i'm looking out the window for ten minutes.
i look down at my now shaking hands as the teacher goes over the question and moves on.
i look around,
my head turns and everything is in slow motion.
this can't be happening.
this is first period.
not even noon yet
and i realize i'm crying in my class.
my breathing gets heavier and i can't do anything.
i feel paralyzed and trapped inside my own mind.
i can't get out,
i can't help myself.
so i cry,
in class.
i cry silently then i leave.