I was born broken
synapses misconnected
only rerouted by the additives
from chemicals sometimes misspoken
Now I'm shattered
and the only one who can fault is that face in my mirror
I say it was the man who's namesake took on Goliath

like Goliath, he ravaged me and made me question
question who every one else saw in the mirror
but it's not his fault that I've changed
I let him start the film
the rated R film in my brain that won't leave me be
in day and in night
I scream you idiot, idiot, idiot
why? why? why?
every time I let it happen and wonder after
panting and crying what happened
what happened to Disney Movies, and Saturday shows
to happy sing-a-longs and family scriptures
traveling across the ocean to my hawa'ii to find my ohana
thinking to capture back
old lost spirits
idiot, idiot, idiot
why?why? why?
I look up at Him
I'm weak
your Mary has become a beggar
sainthood is gone
an angel has fallen and
wings have shattered
now to the next day
will I ask again, why did I  do it again?
or am I free to live again?