I don't know what to do.

I don't know why I'm here, I used to be happy, lively and have direction, now its all gone, im hollow and don't recognize my own reflection

I don't know why I wake up or if I even want too, the heaviness in my chest has taken over and the world i see has a grey hue.

all i want to do is close the door too not feel this pain anymore, run away and cut the tape but the shadows of me wont let me escape

I cant go on living this way, but cant go back the way I came I need to find a way to move on but all my will has somehow gone

I have no direction, no goals and no dreams but when I try to think about it all I hear are internal screams, I'm  just alive for the sake of being alive and soon even that wont be enough, my life is in a constant nose dive and climbing out is too tough

I've been falling for far too long, theirs nothing left, I'm not strong , every decision I make seems wrong and plummets me further into this horrifying hole that has become my life, every minute I'm alive I'm having internal strife about weather I should keep trying or grab the closest  knife.

I know that's the cowards way out of this hell, so for now I'm going to keep trying to escape this cell, ill keep trying to cope and with what's left of me, I'll try to hold on to the hope, that one day ill see, that this pain hasn't killed what's left of Salvi, and maybe I've just been sick forever, and that one day all of this will make sense when I finally get better.