Got close to the place today
The place where it all began and died
It's like coming home
but coming home with a drain
coming home with a pain
A home that was only a house
Isn't everyone the same?

Tears come to my eyes
I wanna curl up and cry
when I'm back
to the place where I used to die.

Never kissed, never loved
Never listened, never grows
This is how you break a soul
Got far away, but always close
This is how you sew the hole

So much death, so much life
I was confused, but I always knew
"Why don't you kick dark off you
I can't kick myself off me, it's true"
And darkness always holds me
when no one does

Now I stand there, healed but still stirred
Because there is nothing pills cannot make
nothing love cannot save
(and I'm not ashamed; still insane!)
I could walk up there
to reconcile my love and hate
Makes (a little) sense in the light of today
Still you'd all choke on me and my man
And I would happily take that! Like you - I never was!

This is the coda to a bitter song
This is the progressive healing of the heart.
I am back - but I won't ever be.
You'll see me rise - I see.