I am mad
raving and loony          
too tired to continue        
too ambitious to quit      
full of conflict and contradiction
a heart beating without purpose    
lungs breathing without life
When did I die?          
How old was I when I died?
21?  23?  I hardly know          
all I know is that now I am dead
with a pulse in my veins            
thoughts in my head
yet still dead
I have the will to go on
and the drive to rise each day
growling and yelling
though I am so alone
I never fear of being heard        
          it was the loneliness that killed me
drove me to hysteria and never back
left me there like an unwanted guest
even loneliness didn't want me
I am too dead to be miserable
I am nothing
and everything
and I am dead.