1) Why is it that every time i try to leave my body are also the times you emphasize the little things that don't really matter to me?

It'll be days where I'll hear you whisper to me things like:
"No one's gonna call or text you."
"Your wallet is nothing more than a hollow shell of an accessory that makes you feel like an adult."
"Everything you have right now will mean nothing to anyone because the successes you've had were meaningless to begin with."

2) Why are you such a hypocrite?

You've always reminded me that I have friends that look out for me but days later, you take it back and tell me that no one loves me.

You've always reminded me to keep my phone and wallet at the pockets of my pants because it's more worthy than myself yet days later, you tell me these are my most useless possessions

You've always reminded me to study hard and challenge myself everyday yet this whole time you remind me that once I disappear, so will everything I worked for.

3) Do you want me to go or do you want me to stay?

I can sense you're helpless without me. You always want me to help you find your phone or your wallet because no one else will. You want me to help you become literate for the sake of just being literate.

But from all the help that I do, all I get are your sadistic paybacks. You torment me in ways that I feel manipulated, helpless, and weak.

4) You're so powerful yet why do you need me?

You can just pick up that ringing phone with 3 notifications from my friends asking me "What's wrong?".

You can just read that book about theories all by yourself.

You can get the paper on your wallet that has "Do not cut yourself" written in it.

You can do anything without me. yet...

5) Why do you always remind me that things will get better but as I get older, it only gets worse?