you planted me a garden of wildflowers,
all my favorites and
every kind i didn’t even know i loved.
you picked every flower for me,
handed them over in a bouquet tied with red ribbon,
your love coloring each petal.
your smile was so wide, hope
so big
and i lit the bouquet on fire.
i watched as your face changed, as
the negativity took over and your words tinged blue.
i probably cried a lot less than you,
but
i still cared. that was six months ago and
now you’ve saved up enough to
plant me a new garden, with some old favorites but
new ones as well.  and you thought,
you really thought that
when you gave me that red ribbon bouquet i would take it. you thought i would maybe stop hurting you.
at some points, to be honest,
so did i.
save your garden for someone more deserving,
someone better than the mess i am.
i’m sorry i couldn’t accept your flowers.