Heart ache but not quite a heart break
Happiness exchanged for sorrow
Tears exchanged for my smile

I didn't want this
I grew up too fast
I learned things before I was ready

Now it's all I know
Now I can't break it
And it hurts him
The one I hold dearest

He distrusts my words
Because of my past actions

He distrusts my feelings
Because of my present actions

I feel numb
With an aching heart
And broken spirit

I apologize relentlessly
But it never seems enough
Because I'm addicted to my actions

My past has caused damage
Damage to me
And everything I believe
And everything I do now

It haunts me
It drains me
It kills me

Yet, I can't seem to stop
I can't seem to fix it
And I'm helpless