horrendous
though embedded
through immemorial life..
unexpected
this singular testimony..
one's discovery
of essential being
there in plummeting depths
of darkest time..

the discovery
not confided..
of terrible truth
in secrecy guarded
with rarity spoken..
but when
always with tears..

the discovery
a flame within
a newfound dimension
found with horror..
then awe overshelming
joined with surprise
of inexpressible joy..
this more real
than earlier notions
of what's out there
and in here..

the discovery
a radiant thread
the connector
of life with death..
inestimable worth
transformed awareness
new birth
still..too frightening
too wondrous
to mention..
gifts of war...

(this is for my
dear friend, Paul,
and his gift work
to elevate the
consciousness
of us all...)