For I now can't swim on a waves that are heavy some days and soft on others..
For this intense wave I stayed with kept me wondering what tomorrow would bring  
Somehow always hoping it'd be a different wave
One that will keep me elevated and not frustrated
Though as the days and months would pass the more I was invested with an endless quest
As cold as the ocean breeze was I stayed put because it was a familiar place
My heart was determined and would not allow me to give up in search for what I wanted
I soon began to think I was the problem for not receiving consistency
I then changed my techniques
And was still not remotely enough
Yet when these uplifting waves returned they would awaken a side of me that had sworn to be done and tired of waiting
All that left my mind knowing I'd be content with the time being
Even after knowing exactly how it would end
I then soon began to ask myself is this something I should have to go through? Knowing the exact type of energy that I would need to keep me out off jeopardy.
Letting go of the hope and thoughts that swam through my mind and body soon began to feel heavenly
No more sleepless nights that consisted of trying to find new ways to bring back those gracious waves towards me
Instead that energy went towards accepting the fact that those waves were just simply not for me..
Regardless of the outcome being elevated by this everlasting wave will be one that will be instilled in me for as long as I continue to be intuned with myself..
for this wave I found a purpose
Sometimes you can't swim on the same wave forever
It's always best to swim away to find better tides
To find something so deep that even the ocean would be jealous.