i crossed one of my biggest goals
off my list for the next summer
but i was thinking of what i were
to do now that that is done and
i was hoping i would have a better
idea of where i was to go what i
was to do and something feels as
if it has given out inside of me

as if my body has forgotten what
keeps it upright moving through the
world and i cannot speak to anyone
not my family or the friends i only
pretend to have so i am alone for
all intents and purposes so i keep
my phone on do not disturb to ignore
all the calls and messages i do not
get and spend holiday nights away
in strange places with people who
are unknown and strange hoping that
the next morning it will make a
little bit more sense and i will know