I want you to return me to the ground with an apology letter
Because you’re not supposed to wake the dead
forget the rumbles we thought we had in our chest you make me want to break down
pull my hair out of my head and knot a noose with it
doesn’t matter how far I’ve gotten it’s about where I’m at now
at rock bottom and you can pretend that every time you took me there it was an accident
Just another one of those things I did to myself
but you slapped away my hand every time I cried out for you to hold it
every place I asked you to kiss you ignored
I’m not the only one who feels
lifeless
you tell me I make you want to put a loaded gun in your mouth because you never feel good enough
but don’t you see I am the one who is nothing
just a bag of bones
hollow on the inside
plastic on the outside
just a ******* toy melted together
with a ******* painted on smile
the type of worthless **** you’d get in a happy meal
only I’m not happy and i haven’t been for as long as I’ve been able to remember
I am just another toy that you tinker with and destroy
Only I am not a car
You can’t troubleshoot me
and fix the problem
I am just a sour putrid pit
that you will spit out and leave in the soil
and then that soil is torn open by cold metal shovels and then I am buried inside
alone
left to rot
in a dressed up coffin.
in a dressed up life, with a dressed up family.
in a dressed up world