The wind blows harder up here,
As though it is trying to push
these skyscrapers toppling over.
The air is purer,
easier on the nose.
The normal gas fumes from the city buses
and the polluted, busy streets don't threaten to strangle you
when you're too high for them to reach.
The people are tiny.
Like ants in chaos,
scrambling
because you accidentally set a foot
on their grainy mound.
The sounds are distant.
Taxi horns' blow sounds like squeaks of mice
while construction workers' jack hammers mimic wood peckers.
Clouds suffocate the sky,
smothering the sunlight,
refusing to let it shine as it should.
Temptation sneaks up on me,
beckoning me
over the edge of the building.
Would it be such a bad idea?
Just one move, that's all it would take.
No effort required at all.
I picture myself jumping,
as I have multiple times before.
The wind in my hair,
gravity pulling me in,
the free falling feeling in my stomach.
And at this point,
Temptation almost makes me do it,
End it all.
But I decide against it.
And even though I have won
once again,
I still feel
defeated.