I think I'm in love with Alan Sugar, And it isn't for his magnificent beard. Nor for the way he fixes the boardroom With a steely gaze that must be feared. I think I'm in love with Alan Sugar, And it's not due to the cut of his tailored suit, Nor to the way he points his finger Or how he has *** loads of loot. I think I'm in love with Alan Sugar, And it's not for the 'banter' with Karen & Claude, I gaze at the screen on Tuesday evening, I wonder if Alan knows how he's adored?