I’m the most complicated person when it comes to saying what I want. But I know exactly what I want. Although getting that is beside the point what I want is to move at my own pace. There is so much pressure in there needing to be a decision and rushing into a commitment before there's even a true connection. I'm looking for any excuse to not fall for someone because deep down I'm not ready and the loneliness will never be as strong as the respect I have for myself. A body next to me at night will never fill the void. There's something bigger than a chance at love that is holding me back. It could be that my heart was broken enough to break me, my body used like a lifeless blow up doll without a choice time and time again by too many, by giving myself to only one and be taken by one, two, three, four, five. To be beaten for half of my young life and held down, degraded, ashamed of the skin I lived in and voice I spoke. The numbers are too much to fathom but I am worthy of love but not before I let go and love myself… #MeToo