In youth group, we're reading a book called
Do Hard Things.
And I try.
Kind of.

We all had to sign up to do a "hard thing"
From the back of the book until Christmas.
I signed up for what
I thought would be the easiest:
Wake up early every morning to
Read my bible.
Easy?
Yeah right.

Honestly, I don't even know why
It's so hard.
I set my alarm for only half an hour earlier than usual
Almost every night.
But then when it goes off,
I reach down and turn it off.
I even moved my alarm clock
To the other side of my room so
I would stop doing that.
But I still do.
Why?

I honestly can't even
Give a good reason why
I don't just do it.
Maybe I'm just too lazy?
Maybe I go to bed too late at night?
Or maybe...

Maybe
I'm afraid.

I'm afraid of what
I'll see when I
Finally open the Holy Book.
I'm afraid I'll see myself in all the
Stories of the sinners.
The sinners who were driven out
Of their homes and cities.
The sinners who were killed
For just being human and
Nothing more.

Yeah, maybe that's it.
Just maybe.
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JMB