i know you're writing to me
but i can't bear to think
that you really gave me
a single one of your
precious thoughts.
for i am no longer the center
of your universal reach
nor will i be for a long time.
i made a vow to you
and i broke it into tiny
fragments of glass and
mirrored gemstones
all promises of a life i would
give you for an eternity
lies and more lies on top
of golden twisted lies.
and on top of those
false apologies and pleas.
i'm surprised you even
thought to have my name
cross your mind, for i
am not worthy to be on
your shores of soft sand
a sparkling ocean in your
eyes. you made me realize
my deepest fears and gave
me the most valuable lesson
to use things
and not people. for that,
i am eternally grateful
and for this separation i
wish i had the courage to
make a plea to the universe
but you are far from my grasp
and my loneliness now
is payment for the scarred
lips i left on your body.
forgiveness is not even something
i wish for any longer.
just eternal detachment from
this pain of seeing you
in a state of incredible joy
that is not coming from
my repaired and loving embrace.