This is a Pregnancy loss Poem that is quite long. I wanted to warn ahead of time in case of triggering topics!
You dont know what its like To have millions of dreams for the future and then have them ripped away from you all in a blink of an eye.
You dont know what its like to love a tiny human you havent even met yet just to have to say goodbye before you even said Hello.
You dont even know what its like To give birth to your child just to hear *"she's gone" and cry like your heart has been ripped out.
You dont know what its like to go home with empty arms when all you want to do is cling to your child.
You dont know what its like To never hear their first cry or laugh, or see their first smile orΒ Β hear their first "I love you mommy/Daddy".
You dont know what its like to feel like you failed your child when they needed you the most and hear the words "there is nothing you can do"
You dont know what its like to hold your child's urn and sob Sob for the life you never met sob until there are no more tears left
You dont know what its like to wake up in the middle of the night from a horrible nightmare only to realize it's actually your new reality
You dont know what its like to feel like there is a hole in your heart that doesnt seem to ever heal or lessen but seems to grow deeper with each breath.
You dont know what its like to be jealous of the people around you Holding and showing their newborn babies and Screaming *"ITS NOT FAIR!"
You dont know what its like To be told *"GOD HAD A REASON" and wanting to scream "You're god must be cruel to want my child dead!"
You dont know what its like To be stuck in so much pain and watch the world around you move on Terrified you're child will soon be forgotten by them.
You dont know what its like to be so Terrified to talk about them becuase you dont want to make others uncomfortable But it pains you deeply to be silent
You dont know what its like to wake up each morning knowing your baby is no longer with you, that you have to keep going on without them
And if you know what it is like I am so Terribly Sorry for your pain No one and I mean NO ONE Should have to go through this pain. I wouldn't even wish it on my worst enemy
To my Daughter Carole Jean who was born sleeping exactly three months ago today on 5/26/17. Born too early at only 20 weeks and 4 days of my pregnancy. I love you babygirl Now and forever!!
ALSO! I am NOT bashing anyone's belief with the line "Your god must be cruel to want my child dead!" I was very angry and was angry at all the higher powers for taking my child away from me. I am very opened and respectful when it comes to Religion. Everyone has the RIGHT to believe in what makes them happy :-D