I feel it again
The sorrow, the emptiness
The dark cloud up above, lingering over head

Is it just a chemical imbalance
Is it sleep deprivation
Is it you

What is causing this
Why does it hurt
Why do I always come back to this feeling

I try to escape but it welcomes me back like an old friend
Like I am unable to go on without it
I don't want to be in it's grasp anymore

Is it loneliness
Is it guilt
Is it depression
Is it you

It can not be an addiction
That requires dependency
I do not depend on you for happiness
You just happen to be the only source of it at the moment

I have always been too passionate
I give everything my all, every ounce of my being
I'm either all in or all out
All or nothing
I feel every emotion too deeply that even after a day of complete happiness, I feel drained

It has come to the point where I feel all my emotions all at once or none at all
I suppose I have gotten so used to being numb,
Being completely emotionless,
That feeling again is overwhelming

I must be broken
Or wired wrong
Or insane

Why is it everyone else seems to have it under control
Have all their emotions and be able to live without shutting down

Why must I walk around like a zombie just to get through the day

Twenty two years and I've just been trying to survive
I suppose it's time, no matter how hard it will be,
To look life straight in the eye and say
*"Bring it"