I woke up with your voice in my head saying "I don't love you anymore." I thought I would die without you and I think I did, I've changed so much that I'm not sure I know myself. He kisses me and all I think about is the taste of your lips and I keep calling people your name and it tastes like poison and I can feel my heart breaking every time I think of you. Why did you have to leave? He hugged me and asked "Why is your chest so cold?" I resisted the urge to tell him it's because there's an icebox where my heart used to be. I'm playing all these game and I know it's Russian roulette and one day the bullet is going to go through me faster than my heartbeats the first time you kissed me but it won't **** me because I am already dead. My chest felt heavy when I saw you looking at her the way you used to look at me, you cook for her and she wears your clothes and my blood boils because I'm easily replaced. I can't get myself to delete our pictures together because I admire the happy person I was, I grieve my smile and my shining eyes in your arms. I grieve my happiness. My tears taste like ***** and I can't breathe when I'm with him because my chest is full of dead flowers you once planted in me, your love killed everything. Why did you have to leave? After everything I've given you, after all this love that no creature in the world is capable of. I loved you and it torn me apart. It ruined me. Deformed me. Stripped me out of what's left of my sanity and left me a lifeless shell trying to feel something in anyway possible. I miss you so much that I miss the stupid little things like making you coffee and scratching your back. I miss your fingers tangled in my hair while I lay on your thighs, I remember nothing else mattered in these moments and all I thought about was how much I adored every inch of your soul with every inch of my skin. My best friend cried at how much pain I was going through she wanted my heart to be pieced back together but she didn't know how to sew and I lost my heart to begin with. I'm hurting people, because I'm taking revenge on this world that made me a fragile doll broken to a thousand pieces by a boy that didn't know how to love me. I remember two nights before you decided I'm not worth fighting for how I was in your arms singing you a sweet love song and I swear you looked at me like I was the only girl in the world and after you left you told me it was all a lie and you stopped loving me three weeks before. There's no greater pain than a heartbreak. It's alright if I seep into the darkness because the light has long gone from my soul and if one day this ends up as my suicide letter; I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.