8 years.  No collective cheers or beers shared.  Together enduring the same weather I can only wonder how we'd've faired.  I think we woulda been a strong team, the likes of which could not be compared.  All a fantasy, the reality is you're still a part of me.  Can't say I think about you constantly, but more in the last 8 than the previous 18.  One quick passing dream, imagining a table sitting you and me, first time seeing you in 23.  We so often speak rest in peace, but I hope you currently think less of what could be than me.  Sometiiiiiimes I think you are around.  Little things in my life that ring so profound.  But I wanna hear the sound of words to me through your essence.  I ask today for you to give me a sign of your presence.  Help me become aware of my lessons.  Still learning to ease myself when within there is tension.  I miss you and the relationship we almost had.  I send my love, rise in peace dad.

I still remember 8 years past.  Friends scooped me up in a parents SUV and we smoked hash in the back.  A silent memorial cuz words were hard to grasp.  But here I am still trying to improve not losing self, only the mask.  Thank you for keeping me on track. One day may we collaborate and spend time to love and laugh.  One love~