Make it stop
Today was a good day
I feel happy
I keep telling myself
Don't let the emptiness creep back in
I'm supported, I'm loved
I know this
I feel it
But doubt is never ending
and I know it can come back
I don't want it to
I'm okay now
I'm free
at least I thought that I was
and I'm scared
please don't leave me
I can't get close
I recoil
I pull back
It's what I do
But I don't want it to be like this
because as soon as I feel loved and content
I remember that I can loose it all
so its better not to risk it
But I want to
half the time at least
I'm scared
don't let me get dark again
I can't handle that anymore