I want to hurt myself. I want to die. I want to suffer. I hate all this pain. Mental pain is horrible. The worst of any pain. I want to disappear. I want to go to my bedroom and only leave when necessary. I want to never leave my house again. I want to take those matches and I want to set myself on fire. I want to swallow every pill I have and I want to curl up on my bed, in the dark, and cry myself to sleep. Then, I want to never wake up. I want to gouge out my eyes so I can never cry again. I want everyone to hate me, because I can't accept that they don't. I want to be a failure because that's all I deserve. I want to slice my legs up so they're symmetrical. I want people to be disgusted by my scars, by me. I just hate being in pain for so long. I am weak.