I feel as if I'm sinking,
but also as if I'm the one
who tied the weight around my ankles

i've
  never
    been
      more
        confused.

my heart is a ticking time bomb
and the after shock will be worse than the initial blow,
i promise you.

like a handgun just fired,
or fresh blood dripping in clean snow,
it's noticeable, my love for self-destruction.

the scent of sadness lingers around my being
and soap won't strip the depression
out of my hair so i guess im stuck here.