I told my self

if he asked I would say yes

That I would finally find bliss


It took months of praying

And a crowbar to open my mouth to say,

But I loved him


So WHY

WHY didn't I try

WHY did I deny,

My feelings

WHY couldn’t I spread my wings,

And say yes


My brain froze

All previous planning was bulldozed

In that moment

I witnessed two worlds crashing

Leaving my lungs gasping


I loved him

Not enough for my mouth to start flapping

to make my brain stop thinking


I love him

So why isn't it enough