I read and observe and learn
of the human ability to feel
gratitude joy and love
being able to endure such pain
letting go of anger and remorse
hatred and jealousy
violence and silent deaths

I listen to positive encouraging talk
surround myself with people who smile
acknowledge the ones who claim
they will treasure each day as
if it were their last
outspoken generous vocals
calm soothing voices

And no matter how hard I try
I can not live throughout each day
without feeling hate or anger
or remorse and silent deaths
I can not feel gratitude
can not seek out the sincerity wallowed
up in people's eyes and hands
I can not think of a better world
being able to cause change and
living for the greater cause

All I know is that
when I turn my head
this way and that and
peer down the road laid out
made of asphalt covered with grass
no matter how hard I try
how hard I pray and wish

in the end all I can see is
sparkling eyes and twisted hearts.