I miss you constantly
You are just beside me
Some thousands of miles
Of seas and skies away.

It is baffling that I could share the same sun
Admire the same moon, as you might feel inclined to do
And somehow be too far to ever count it
As sharing the same space.

I see all of who you've shown me you are
And I package you in precious pieces
That I hide in my limbic system
And scatter through my striatum.

When it rains, I can't help but wonder
If these little droplets were ever closer to you than me
And I hate and love them in a single instant
Until I can hear and see and love you again.

I miss you with an intensity that scares me,
Considering I have yet to meet you,
And every second closer I am to seeing you
The lump in my throat grows impossibly larger.

I am closer to you when I speak of you
Face lit in an involuntary, irremovable, lovesick smile
The people who asked must regret it terribly
But, as a sap in love, I tell them anyway.

I occasionally regret ever buying the plane ticket
I constantly regret buying the plane ticket
To meet you would be the greatest joy
And infinitely more so my greatest nightmare.

Why would I give myself temporary relief?
I will see you and hold you and split my face smiling
And then I will leave you and miss you ten times more.
I am willingly subjecting myself to this.

I will miss you more than I do.
It will hurt, come good or bad,
It will feel worse than most things
It will feel better than most things.

It will feel like liberation, like knowing the grand prize
It will feel like drowning, slowly, agonizingly
It will feel like the rush of falling from a height
It will feel like the instantaneous pain of hitting the ground.

I miss you constantly.
You are just beside me
Unthinkably far, impossibly close
Within my thoughts.