Beyonce's Lemonade made me cry
Weep just silent tears streaming down my face
Two pivotal moments within 57 minutes
Moved to tears.

Just as I have been thinking
That I'm a dry well in need of warm water.

The sounds of moaning, hiccups
Laughter
My room mate and her lovers took over the Campbell House today.
It is very annoying.

But I educate and grow my mind
Sleep comes soon
And the bodies in this room
Too will be gone
The shenanigans can only last so long.

My brothers girlfriend left him again
I wish everyone in my house would stop talking
Just for a moment, that I could cut out all the sound
Delete my snap chat, any moment showcasing
Things I perhaps you could say,
Miss out on you
But I would rather grow my mind
Do my time
Last night I hit a frenzy
Every time a man looked my way
I looked the other direction
And very kindly and sternly asked them
To get off the **** stage

Let the women have their moment.

Plans we were supposed to have
I prefer the solace of my room
Tomorrow is Monday.

Beautiful Innovator calls me on the phone
We run and ignite fires, keeping them fresh and hot
In different parts of Chicago
The leader of Canvas compared me to a hawk last night
He said
I'll grow into a swan
Hawk. I'm beautiful but dangerous
Hawks eat the faces off of squirrels
But everyone wants to photograph their beauty.

Sometimes I feel trapped by all the love
Of people wanting to jump on the wagon
And it makes me act out in small ways.

It makes me think back
To running away from you in the streets of Chicago
Me and summer time so new
I didn't ******* know you
No, I didn't know you
But you fell in love with me.
And come into my room now when I'm not home
Searching for the last piece of yourself
To claim back.

Take it and go.
And I unblock you on my cell phone
Because its my attempt
To--in the tiniest way
Try to hate you and your mistakes less.

I take criticism
I bite the bullet
I bite my tongue at times
There are so many **** things I could say
But I do pick and choose my battles
I've had a cold for about 3 weeks
Restless. Restless.
We snort ******* and dance the night away
But thats not really my forte.

And of course you did.
Because hawks
Swans
We cannot help but be mystfiied by them.
I think and consolidate
If I could shut all the noise out
Just for the rest of the night
With my two lean hands
I would hold them up to the sky
Let the silence be gold.

Your name got brought up to me last night
I looked just like a mermaid.
Dress my room mate like fire
Opposites, we embrace it
I sink in the deepest puddles of
Not knowing
But I don't wanna always be joined at the hip
Of him or her
And when I feel that begin to happen
I run.

So here I am running in reverse in the pits of my brain
My room thats slowly falling apart
Shabby gyspy living, can't keep it up
I don't wanna be a gypsy no more.

I wanna live
And I wanna be so alive
And I don't want it to be for anyone
But the goodness and joy of life
Regardless of how hard things get
Or how dull a moment can become
But I'm strong enough to lock myself away in my room
When I need and want

I was asked tonight what is my end goal
And I said
I no longer know what any of that looks like.