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Apr 2016
When you had a bae
But then she was just like
"Aye, so this guy asked me out and I said yes"
So now you're just sad.
Because I'm alone now,
You see I wasn't like you,
I didn't have someone else,
I had these feelings I felt,
And they were only for you.
Because when everyone else wasn't,
You still were.
You were who I had
And that was all that I wanted.
And you made it seem so easy to just let me go,
Because maybe this had been building so,
When he came you just said
"Yeah *****, I'm down"
Even though that meant letting me down.
And that hurt me so much,
Because I loved you,
I really ******* did,
And I know that
Because now it's been more than a year,
And still sitting here,
Hoping it won't work out,
So you'll come back and say
"I'm sorry for backing out"
Like I did when it didn't for me,
And I know I was an ***,
But ****, time allows for this to pass,
And I'm hoping, dreaming even,
That this does too, to keep things even,
You see, I hope that you hurt,
That in the days and weeks proceeding
You felt at a loss because you didn't have me.
You let go of me,
But how am I supposed to be free
When I'm trapped inside me?
When we were together
I had a whole other world to explore
But suddenly it was like
Donald Trump built his wall,
And I was imprisoned inside
In the world that I knew but was falling apart.
You see, I hope that you hurt.
Not because I want you to be sad,
All I ever wanted was for you to be happy.
But not like this,
I wanted to be happy with you.
And I'm glad that you smile,
I'm so grateful that you're happy,
But I can't deny
That I'm ******* mad.
No, that I'm sad,
Because you didn't include me.
Like it was only about you.
I was only about you.
I wish you had been about me,
The same way,
I would always say,
That every passing day
I would continue to stay
With You.
Does it mean that I can wait
Two years for a fate
That says I can ask you out,
And then again you'll back out,
But this time it's better,
Because it'll be for the better,
The better of me,
I am selfish, you see.
Or will things have changed,
Be rearranged
To fit a kaleidoscope
That eliminates my hope?
I sure hope not,
Because I still want you here,
In a figurative sense,
Like it always had been,
I'm sorry there was distance
And that that made it hard,
To remember that we existed
In each other's hearts.
But in a way that made it real,
I was only to you,
And you were only to me,
No else would know how we feel,
And we kept that between us,
And that is what we must
Continue to be
So no one would see,
And no one would get between
The lines that tied you to me.
I can't get through to you,
But what else am I supposed to do?
Even though today
I am no closer to you,
Than I was a year ago,
When I was unprepared for this change
That to me was nothing but strange,
And anything but welcome.
I'm writing to you,
And I know you won't see this,
But I hope that you do,
Because no one else will care.
And I hope that when you see this,
It will bring back something,
Something that is okay
In my world of things that are not okay.
Víctor Manuel Serna
Written by
Víctor Manuel Serna  Tucson, AZ
(Tucson, AZ)   
341
   WistfulHope
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