a fly landed on my shoulder and says;
'say Bro! put a spoonful of that mint chocolate-chip ice cream
to the side and I'll just chill and let you enjoy the rest of your bowl.
whattya say, my man?'
I pondered the offer for a minute
but flies ain't my favorite creature
so I smacked his *** and he did a tumble on the coffee table,
brushed off his wings and said;
'big mistake my man
big mistake!
I wanted to be friends but you gotta go bein' an ***-hole!
well, you'll regret the rejection of my offered friendship
and with that he buzzed off
that night at 3am I woke up and the fly was sittin' on my nose
'WAKE UP *****!
guess what! I just spent 20 minutes rollin' around in fresh dog dootie
and now I'm tap dancin' on your nose...ya like that!?
I think I'll spend some time in your fat neighbor's arm pit
before I say hello tomorrow night
okay...now you go back to sleep so I can wake you up'
and he woke me up 4 more times that night
he came the next night and did it all over again
he did this for weeks until I was on the verge of losing my job
and my sanity from lack of sleep
then one night he woke me up and said;
'Well, have you learned your lesson, ****** bag?
when someone offers their friendship for very little in return,
accept it with open arms and not a closed heart'
He was right
I admitted that I was wrong and shouldn't have rejected him
just because he was a fly
'Alright....now, you got any of that mint chocolate-chip ice cream?'
I'm afraid not little dude
'No problem...tell ya what...next time ya drop a deuce,
don't bother to flush'
and we laughed until the Sun came up.