If you've ever had the chance to message me, You'll realise at times I'll use the word ****. Its nonsensical in a way but for me it meant more. **** was the first word I can recall my late father saying. **** was the word that brought laughter when I was sad. **** still remains to have nostalgic value to me. **** reminds me of the times when I pooped my pants, And had people help me clean myself up. In a way that **** and pants story reflects moments, Moments in my life in which I became a horrid mess. **** isn't just ****, For when I die I don't want people being sad, Or even uttering 'oh ****!' I want them to say 'oh ****!', For then and only then would I know that, I truly lived.