drive myself crazy
flashing lights behind glass
friendships don't touch
links don't feel

why do I do this?
why why why do I replay this
obscene routine of hate?
how very silly of me
thinking people want me there
but no I'm just here
—not there—
behind a screen

not immersed with those
coloured lights
no no man
body don't pulse with that music

I started writing this book
once
and I put you all in it because yeah I really believed we
defined each other's lives
so I stopped writing the stupid book

I'm not in yours so I'll
wait until the pages write themselves
and erase you all out

I kept buying you ink and that's stupid
I kept holding a tin can to my ear man
weren't you at the other end?