Jan 2016
When you live in the suburbs like I do and like I always have,
the same house even, there is an intimacy that develops- real or imagined -with your neighbors. It's like those dreams we sometimes have about people and places that really do exist, but it just ain't quite what it's supposed to be , but we accept it anyway, because it's a dream and in that ethereal realm of dreams -that's what you do ...you accept the normally unacceptable.
For instance, who could ever have imagined that the Rosses ,who live at 1423 ,would turn out to be secret swingers ? Mr. Ross is 62 years old, probably five foot nine with a horseshoe ring of white on white cotton- fluff hair, perched on his round pink scalp, over his round pink face , accentuated by round -wire rim- glasses perched on his nose and a little white mustache that hangs under his nose - like an afterthought.
Mrs Ross is a slightly rounded little woman that always wears flowery dresses, and those god awful tortoiseshell glasses secured to a string around the neck like secretaries and librarians often wear. Her hair would also be white , if not for her habit of having it dyed blue , as is a habit of many suburban housewives of her age .
So it would be impossible to ever imagine this pair of- short , jolly - suburbanites as secret swingers , but it's true. . I know! Because I've seen them at it . About 2 years ago- while Billy Joe Randall , Macy and me were( oh yeah my name is Rance Reed short for Clarence -but don't call me that ) anyway; where was I -oh yeah -we were down at the little pocket park on Grove Street- sitting behind a hydrangea bush-smoking a fatty- and telling each other lies that no one believes anyway, when we saw the Rosses walking toward the park, holding hands as they were often doing.
Mr Ross looked into the park- suspiciously - as if he were afraid a hit- man were hiding somewhere . There for a moment I thought he could possibly smell our smoke.,but seemingly satisfied with his inspection, the two of them strolled -hand in hand - across the grass to the playground area where the spring horses , the merry-go-round and swings were. Mrs Ross perched herself on the rubber - sling like - seat of a swing as Mr Ross pushed to get her started and then he climbed aboard the one to her left . Using that see-saw motion one uses to get himself going and then the two of them sat there -swinging and laughing together -for almost an hour. Sometimes we could hear Mr. Ross go varoooom varoooom and Mrs. Ross would go wheeeeee. It was the funniest thing that I've ever seen and the three of us sat there making jokes and laughing at them. Three 23 year old wasted wastrels thinking that laughing at this spectacle was the right thing to do . Then a little while later , as a melancholy wave washed over us like a sea tide , we all stopped laughing. All three of us -I believe - realized that jealousy is a hard pill to swallow while you're laughing . Looking back at that now I'm a little ashamed of myself. So yeah, the Rosses were secret swingers , but you would never know it by looking at them--- (Oh! You thought I meant the other kind of swingers. didn't you ? ) -anyway ; where was I ?- Oh yeah .- I believe they were sort of embarrassed about the whole thing so I've never said a word to anyone about what I saw -until now.
Then there is old man George (call me GL ) Angleton and his wife Sarah. Theirs was the big grey, split -level rock and cedar house that dominates the very end of the cul-de-sac we live on called Grayson circle . An enormous porch dominates the front and that is the first thing anyone - turning onto Grayson Circle- sees after making the turn. The Angeltons house was always the most decorated house on the block , no matter the holiday, especially at Christmas- when a raucous mix a snowmen, reindeer and especially Santa's, gathered under the thousands of twinkling lights each year. There were so many Santas on the lawn, on the roof ,along the porch , one climbing the chimney that- I always thought - it looked like the gathering together of Santa's for a Santa gang fight.
Halloween was another special time with the Angeltons when they gave out more -kinds and just plain more -candy to all the kids than anyone else for blocks around or even miles around. One year Mr. Angleton gave a comic books along with the candy to every kid that came to the door.
So who could have ever imagined that just 6 months ago , 2 days before Christmas , Mr Angleton , who was always of sweet disposition and always quick to give you a warm smile or a compassionate pat on the shoulder would shoot and **** his wife Sarah and then turn the gun on himself ? NOBODY!!!
Certainly not me.
No, you cannot just see the outside of a house, with the flocks of flowers , the nice neat lawn and charming old rocking chairs on the porch and really know anything about the heights of happiness or the depths of despair that live or die behind the front doors .
When I was growing up , you sure couldn't have done any of that at my house. Looking back now I realize that G.L .didn't put out any decorations last Christmas .
I should have noticed that. Yeah , I really should have noticed that!
the same house even, there is an intimacy that develops- real or imagined -with your neighbors. It's like those dreams we sometimes have about people and places that really do exist, but it just ain't quite what it's supposed to be , but we accept it anyway, because it's a dream and in that ethereal realm of dreams -that's what you do ...you accept the normally unacceptable.
For instance, who could ever have imagined that the Rosses ,who live at 1423 ,would turn out to be secret swingers ? Mr. Ross is 62 years old, probably five foot nine with a horseshoe ring of white on white cotton- fluff hair, perched on his round pink scalp, over his round pink face , accentuated by round -wire rim- glasses perched on his nose and a little white mustache that hangs under his nose - like an afterthought.
Mrs Ross is a slightly rounded little woman that always wears flowery dresses, and those god awful tortoiseshell glasses secured to a string around the neck like secretaries and librarians often wear. Her hair would also be white , if not for her habit of having it dyed blue , as is a habit of many suburban housewives of her age .
So it would be impossible to ever imagine this pair of- short , jolly - suburbanites as secret swingers , but it's true. . I know! Because I've seen them at it . About 2 years ago- while Billy Joe Randall , Macy and me were( oh yeah my name is Rance Reed short for Clarence -but don't call me that ) anyway; where was I -oh yeah -we were down at the little pocket park on Grove Street- sitting behind a hydrangea bush-smoking a fatty- and telling each other lies that no one believes anyway, when we saw the Rosses walking toward the park, holding hands as they were often doing.
Mr Ross looked into the park- suspiciously - as if he were afraid a hit- man were hiding somewhere . There for a moment I thought he could possibly smell our smoke.,but seemingly satisfied with his inspection, the two of them strolled -hand in hand - across the grass to the playground area where the spring horses , the merry-go-round and swings were. Mrs Ross perched herself on the rubber - sling like - seat of a swing as Mr Ross pushed to get her started and then he climbed aboard the one to her left . Using that see-saw motion one uses to get himself going and then the two of them sat there -swinging and laughing together -for almost an hour. Sometimes we could hear Mr. Ross go varoooom varoooom and Mrs. Ross would go wheeeeee. It was the funniest thing that I've ever seen and the three of us sat there making jokes and laughing at them. Three 23 year old wasted wastrels thinking that laughing at this spectacle was the right thing to do . Then a little while later , as a melancholy wave washed over us like a sea tide , we all stopped laughing. All three of us -I believe - realized that jealousy is a hard pill to swallow while you're laughing . Looking back at that now I'm a little ashamed of myself. So yeah, the Rosses were secret swingers , but you would never know it by looking at them--- (Oh! You thought I meant the other kind of swingers. didn't you ? ) -anyway ; where was I ?- Oh yeah .- I believe they were sort of embarrassed about the whole thing so I've never said a word to anyone about what I saw -until now.
Then there is old man George (call me GL ) Angleton and his wife Sarah. Theirs was the big grey, split -level rock and cedar house that dominates the very end of the cul-de-sac we live on called Grayson circle . An enormous porch dominates the front and that is the first thing anyone - turning onto Grayson Circle- sees after making the turn. The Angeltons house was always the most decorated house on the block , no matter the holiday, especially at Christmas- when a raucous mix a snowmen, reindeer and especially Santa's, gathered under the thousands of twinkling lights each year. There were so many Santas on the lawn, on the roof ,along the porch , one climbing the chimney that- I always thought - it looked like the gathering together of Santa's for a Santa gang fight.
Halloween was another special time with the Angeltons when they gave out more -kinds and just plain more -candy to all the kids than anyone else for blocks around or even miles around. One year Mr. Angleton gave a comic books along with the candy to every kid that came to the door.
So who could have ever imagined that just 6 months ago , 2 days before Christmas , Mr Angleton , who was always of sweet disposition and always quick to give you a warm smile or a compassionate pat on the shoulder would shoot and **** his wife Sarah and then turn the gun on himself ? NOBODY!!!
Certainly not me.
No, you cannot just see the outside of a house, with the flocks of flowers , the nice neat lawn and charming old rocking chairs on the porch and really know anything about the heights of happiness or the depths of despair that live or die behind the front doors .
When I was growing up , you sure couldn't have done any of that at my house. Looking back now I realize that G.L .didn't put out any decorations last Christmas .
I should have noticed that. Yeah , I really should have noticed that!
