On wed. My 49/yr old nephew died of a sudden blood clot. My mother is  93 and has 12 children 40+ gr. Children 40-50 gr . grandchildren  dozens of gr.gr.  and some more beyond that and this is the first of any to suddenly pass thru .  
I spent all nite writing and preparing clothes so as I posted what I wrote it was the replies and attention given that allowed me the fortitude to stay out of the dark hole I teetered on so to all my most gracious and heartfelt  appreciation for walking with me as I stumbled along in what was only a dim light. Thanks so much.