stuck between
what i want,
what was,
and what is,
i'm in a constant state of hopeless wondering.
this wondering makes my dreams go  crazy.
reality and the pictures that linger in my mind at night,
intertwine like a schoolgirl's braids.
i twirl my locks around my finger,
until i fall into a black pit of darkness,
that lets the thinking stop.
for hours,
i don't have to worry,
i don't have to cry,
i don't even have to think,
i can just be.
and, i lay there being,
for hours at night,
until daylight puts up "wanted" signs,
and drags me out of my happiness,
plopping me into reality,
with a thud.