you feed your soul with
espresso and city lights,
and you hide the parts of yourself
you detest under too big clothes.
with smeared lipstick and
a slender frame, you promenade
your skin around and leave
everyone around you
gasping for air.
and oh, you often leave yourself
breathless as well,
bent over the toilet
like a paper doll;
thin and fragile and
at risk of disintegration.
spewing words and chunks
of self-hate and self-inflicted
injuries and bruises that never
seem to heal.
you are a beautiful one,
my dear, but you douse yourself
in gasoline each night
before nestling into a bed
of matches;
you just love to watch yourself
burn.