are the lines on your wrists still glowing into the faces of the children who will never understand?
curious
they wonder
and know
you are weak

when the lights turn off in your bedroom
and the covers wrap themselves over your shoulders
around your back
you are safe, but lonely
so you drift to sleep
the lights turn on
and the groans that come from your mouth are sickening
you look sick
you sleep soundly
but the bags under your eyes get larger
packed full of regrets and things you wish you had said
truthfully, every walking animal that roams this rotten earth
is timing their clocks till their remaining days
a death that sneaks up on you without killing you
but it will squeeze your lungs
and slide it's claws through your heart
soon enough your eyes are open
your mind is awake
and people still make you angry
so much that a knife at the sides of your stomach will not fix it
and when you try to pull your finger nails off just to stop biting them
it isn't enough
no pain can reach the immensity of hate
the ghost of vengeance leads me out the gates of hell
and my hidden horns slice the necks of the ones who never took the time to stop their clocks and listen
nobody listens
to the ocean waves coming from the shells in my hair
or the cries coming from the breaking skin we call our own
or the way the cars go by without stopping to take a look outside
at the strangers walking through white snow, catching the bus just to get to a place they call home
listen to the shards and angry scissors that clamp to the fingers of little boys and girls
and the way we eat
hear the chewing of meat from the pigs that screamed
and the minds of the ones who stay quiet
f
  a
     l  
       l  
         i  
           n
              g

into a deep despair
I hide under blanket after blanket
concealing the light
now I wait
for the day
to shut off