There was a time I doubted myself
Helped along by your insistance
I cut myself away to pretend for you
I hurt myself just to please you
And to hope that maybe, just maybe
If I tried hard enough I could make it work
If I could just push it enough
I might not have to struggle with this
After all it would be easier if I could be this way
To wear a skirt because "you're a girl"
To paint my face because "its what girls do"
To adorn myself with lace underwear because "you can't deny your womanhood"
I wish I could
I tried so hard to show you I could be that
I tried so hard to show myself I could be that
So desperately I've longed to 'just be' how I am 'meant' to be
But I couldn't
I can't
As bad as things got between us
I will always thank you for showing me this one thing
That I cannot pretend any more
You showed me that I need this
Just as I need oxygen to breathe
Just as I need food to sustain myself
You taught me that I cannot pretend forever
You showed me that this is who I am
I am male.
I am Zane
No one will ever take that from me ever again.
Thank you.