there's an emptiness in my chest
that cannot be filled
i've know
i've tried

i've filled it with liquor
with empty promises
with kisses that meant nothing

i've filled it with images of lovers
with new things
with anger and hate

i've filled it with touches from others
with memories
with temporary distractions

each has fallen away
slipped through the gap
and left me
wanting
and needing more

at times the hole has grown
others it has shrunk
but still it stays
day in and night out
leaving me feeling
uncomfortable in my own skin

so i will continue to work
to search and to test
to find something that will
finally make me whole