Sep 2015
I don’t know where it goes from here other than the world I occupy by day
Should I learn more about life
Or just about myself
Maybe I am life already
I could look back and try to remember
There are so many moments and facts
I’ve gathered them up
All around me
But I know so many more have been left behind
Some by intention
Some by folly
Some by absolution
How did I become so serious?
Is that what being an adult is about?
Everything well considered
But for how long?
It seems I am preparing for something
Yet some of my best friends are already gone
How can I still be preparing when they are already done?
If I only could know if my experience is enough
Should I find something new?
What if I traveled to where God is life
Or read a book
Or write another one
You never know what you know until you have to explain it
If only they would listen long enough
Seeds that were me
Layers of soil that are the years
Rocks scattered full of stubbornness
Creeks flowing then drying up like uncertainty
Not a walk that could be imagined
Only lived
I thought about the next conversation
But how meaningful can it be when I must continue on
The next ten years must be the same as the last
Currency
Security
Currency
Security
What could one say to save a life when it so hard to live your own?
What could one say to guide a life when it is so hard to find your own?
To be on the ocean
In a storm
Where horizons move faster than chance
And depths hold knowledge we cannot imagine
Because we only know how to earn a living
I wonder if my smile is the same as someone you are considering
Is he so much better than me
Does he know how to love a woman
I know I do
But I’m not sure if I can make you feel that way again
It’s because I’m looking at a book
And a map
And cloth that covers a woman who is trying to be holy
And that is what I cannot know
If it is the next thing I do
Or all the things that I have done
What will tell me if I already know enough
Enough to tell my children they are free
To tell them how to survive
To tell them the world will never be like they dream
Except if they step over rocks
And leap over creeks
To know that stubbornness and uncertainty will no longer matter
It only requires desire
The desire to change
The desire to take a chance
Because what are we waiting for anyway?
To avenge ourselves
Or to make someone’s life better
However slight it may be
What will they remember about you my child
Will they smile at your empathy or frown at your indifference
You see?
The choice is all about desire
The desire to care
And the book
Or the God
Or the woman
They already know these things
As do I
As will you
Should I learn more about life
Or just about myself
Maybe I am life already
I could look back and try to remember
There are so many moments and facts
I’ve gathered them up
All around me
But I know so many more have been left behind
Some by intention
Some by folly
Some by absolution
How did I become so serious?
Is that what being an adult is about?
Everything well considered
But for how long?
It seems I am preparing for something
Yet some of my best friends are already gone
How can I still be preparing when they are already done?
If I only could know if my experience is enough
Should I find something new?
What if I traveled to where God is life
Or read a book
Or write another one
You never know what you know until you have to explain it
If only they would listen long enough
Seeds that were me
Layers of soil that are the years
Rocks scattered full of stubbornness
Creeks flowing then drying up like uncertainty
Not a walk that could be imagined
Only lived
I thought about the next conversation
But how meaningful can it be when I must continue on
The next ten years must be the same as the last
Currency
Security
Currency
Security
What could one say to save a life when it so hard to live your own?
What could one say to guide a life when it is so hard to find your own?
To be on the ocean
In a storm
Where horizons move faster than chance
And depths hold knowledge we cannot imagine
Because we only know how to earn a living
I wonder if my smile is the same as someone you are considering
Is he so much better than me
Does he know how to love a woman
I know I do
But I’m not sure if I can make you feel that way again
It’s because I’m looking at a book
And a map
And cloth that covers a woman who is trying to be holy
And that is what I cannot know
If it is the next thing I do
Or all the things that I have done
What will tell me if I already know enough
Enough to tell my children they are free
To tell them how to survive
To tell them the world will never be like they dream
Except if they step over rocks
And leap over creeks
To know that stubbornness and uncertainty will no longer matter
It only requires desire
The desire to change
The desire to take a chance
Because what are we waiting for anyway?
To avenge ourselves
Or to make someone’s life better
However slight it may be
What will they remember about you my child
Will they smile at your empathy or frown at your indifference
You see?
The choice is all about desire
The desire to care
And the book
Or the God
Or the woman
They already know these things
As do I
As will you
